Do any of you who are on this weight loss journey with me, or those who have reached your final goal, ever think of what the future will be like? I started thinking about it today. What is my life going to look like when I am not dragging around another persons worth of weight with me wherever I go. I already feel amazing. My heart and lungs are in better shape and each day I inch my way away from being obese. I have very specific goals, most of which revolve around sizes and fitness more then an actual weight number. It isn't about a number for me. right now, watching the scale decrease shows me I'm doing what I need to do. Of course, when the scale doesn't move very much I get a bit discourage, however I know that there are so many things going on in my body, fat melting, muscles growing that I don't focus too much on it.
I know that most people when they are losing weight don't want to take pictures of themselves out of embarrassment, I get that. I didn't either, I am however glad I did. It has been such a blessing to see how my body is changing and, even though I am not where I want to finish, I am that much closer to the end.
I have been a bit frustrated that I have been losing, yet not changing clothing sizes as much as I would like too. It takes time and this whole process has really begun to teach me how to be patient. I have been working so hard that i feel like a nice trade off would be smaller clothes.
There is a huge sense of pride that comes with losing this much weight. I have always had a pretty good sense of self-esteem, however, my confidence is better then ever. It's even pushing me to do things I would have never thought to do. Dancing is my new thing. I love it! I used to do ballet in high school and when I was younger. I never stuck to it, or much of anything when I was kid, I am sad i didn't keep with it.
This is what this year is about, getting back to my life and living for me. Taking care of my needs as I have pushed them to the back burner in the past.
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